cold winter wind had brought With it… "一段,李译亦比伍译更为"字对字",而且更为妥贴。除了’这样阴沉的云,和这样侵人的雨"在字面上也比"满天都是乌云,又落雨"更为切合原文而外,"寒冷的冬风刮来……"云云也比"刮起冬天的寒风"更合原文的意思;而这,也足因为伍译要避去欧化句法,所以这半句就不能"组织"的恰好。否则,这半句并不怎样难,以伍先生的译才一定能译得很妥贴的。
再来比较原书第一章的第二段:
I was glad of it: I never liked long walks, especially on chilly afternoons,dreadful
to me was the coming home In the raw twilight,with nipped fingers and toes,and
a heart saddened by the chidings of Bessie, the nurse, and humbled by consciousness
of my physical inferiority to Eliza, John, and Georgiana Reed.
(伍译)这我却很欢喜:我不愿意走远路,尤其是遇着跟冷的下午,薄暮寒光中,散步归来,手脚的冰冷,奶奶贝西的臭骂,已经够我害怕,而我的身体的孱弱,比不上伊里西,左珍纳,约翰他们三个,更使我自惭形秽了。